Thursday, December 1, 2011

I partially succeeded! (Or I failed at failure?)

My husband and I have a sort of running joke about our shared incompetence. Sometimes, we become abruptly horrified by our inability to carry on as well-adjusted, grown-ass adults with a child. We look around one day and realize that we're watching the third Star Trek: Deep Space Nine rerun in a row instead of cleaning out the garage; and that we're eating our cobbled together leftovers-Taco Bell-hot-sauce-and-melted-cheese quesadillas with tiny cartoon character forks because all our real forks are dirty and the dishwasher is clogged with something unidentifiable.

Anyway, we realize that this isn't the way adults with a child are supposed to behave, and that we would like to have a clean, happy home, and that we really don't want to be featured on an upcoming Hoarders episode. So we decide to grow the hell up. This time, we say, we're doing it right. No more ignoring dirty dishes until they pile up. No more avoiding the garage because we're scared of spiders (him) and clutter (me). From this point forward, we're domestic superheroes.

It never happens. But here's what does happen: We get slightly better each time we attempt it. I think, subconsciously, we know that we have to set ridiculously high goals. Then, when we inevitably fall short, we're failing into moderate success. This time around, the dishes are only mostly piled up, the table is mostly clear, and there are no funny smells anywhere in the house. And it's cleanup day, so it only gets better from here! I know; it's amazing. Yea us!

I'm the same way with most things. I planned to blog every day last month for NaBloPoMo, and I didn't. I guess I have some excuses. We had a ton of Serious Life Stuff issues going on this past month. (The thing with Serious Life Stuff is, it usually involves other people, and I'd much rather blog about rattlesnakes and black widows.) Still, I meant to put something up each time. I didn't. But look what I did do! Twenty-one posts in a month. That's something, right? And it's something I think I can keep up. This month should be a little quieter, but there are still appointments and assignments, family events and Chrismas visits. My anniversary is tomorrow (she said, in a shameless ploy to get "Happy Anniversary" comments), and I don't even know if we're doing anything. So yeah; I'm still busy. But 21 posts a month? Turns out I am totally capable of that. Who knew?

Really, I could have put up something most of those missing days, but I don't want to phone it in. I like making quality posts, and I think you all like reading/viewing quality posts, so I'm going to post as often as I can and not do bullshit "Well, here's a post; I'm busy" entries more than once a month or so. I think that's reasonable.

I could spend more time here. I could stress about spending more time writing, and more time looking for writing gigs, and more time with my son and my husband and our families; more time outside and more time cleaning and more time volunteering. But first, that's not possible. And second, I'm tired of stressing about spending time. I think I'll just focus on the spending quality time.

Anyway, thanks for sticking with me while I found my stride. Have a spider and a sunset.


8 comments:

Jax said... Best Blogger Tips

This reminded me in a good way -- well maybe good isn't the right word exactly but it was REMINISCENT OF another post I read by another fantastic writer some time back:

http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/06/this-is-why-ill-never-be-adult.html

And yes I'll never be an adult either. I do appreciate the spiders and sunsets and snakes and your stories of your awesome kid.

Cagey (Kelli Oliver George) said... Best Blogger Tips

That T is gorgeous! Is that a Texas brown?

Thérèse said... Best Blogger Tips

So many treats on your blog and 21 in a month that;s something! Bravo.
I have still to learn on how to hold scorpions with two fingers... I'll have to ask your son one day...

Kim Hosey said... Best Blogger Tips

Jax: Ha; thanks! I'll take that as a compliment. I've only read a handful of her posts (mostly because I know if I really delve in, that's it for me for the next hour or so), but I believe we share a few characteristics with her that heavily inform our writing: Diagnosed, but untreated, ADD; a certain pathological curiosity and penchant for pursuing things contrary to common sense; disdain for "normal;" a long-suffering significant other who plays straight man to my crazy woman; studying science at first but returning to writing ... Now if I only shared her subscription numbers.

And thanks. Spiders/snakes/sunsets/son -- that's my bread and butter.

Cagey: Isn't it gorgeous? It's a desert blonde tarantula, or Arizona blond. (The desert/Arizona distinction varies, as does "blonde"/"blond." It's a Aphonopelma chalcodes.)

Thérèse: Thank you! Getting into a routine is pretty much the hardest thing in the world for me (see ADD, above), but it works out pretty nicely on the rare occasion that I manage it.

The scorpion was handed to him by an expert, but the expert himself did pick it up. Grabbing the business end so you don't have to worry about it seems to be the trick. (Of course, I think the real trick is not usually doing it, especially if you're not sure what kind of scorpion you're dealing with. Fortunately; the big, hairy, impressive ones are also the least venomous; but I wouldn't go around picking up random scorpions.)

Thérèse said... Best Blogger Tips

Hoping everything is fine.
Happy Holidays!

Agrigirl said... Best Blogger Tips

I think 21 posts in a month is amazing - as are your photos. I'm curious what constant blogging does to your readership? I don't think mine would put up with it but I might be wrong. Happy New Year.

Kim Hosey said... Best Blogger Tips

Thérèse: Everything is indeed fine, and I'm back, baby. For really real this time.

Agrigirl: Um, there you go! I let up on the posts this month for my readers! That's it. Seriously, 20-ish seemed to be a good amount -- enough to establish consistency, not so much as to kill myself blogging (offline emergencies notwithstanding). Thanks for you kind words, and I hope you have a very happy New Year!

Thérèse said... Best Blogger Tips

Have a wonderful 2012 with plenty of delightful animals in your bag...