Monday goodies: Finches

Why finches? Well, for one, I have tons of images of them. They're here every day, carpeting our yard, dancing in the air, bickering, chirping. They're fun.

For another, they're pretty cool birds. They started as residents of Mexico and the Southwestern United States, but have been introduced throughout the rest of the country over the years. They're common, sure, but they're adaptable. And feisty.

Have some finchy goodness. And happy Monday.

Some ways to follow me online

Don't have much this Sunday night, but I'm keeping this NaBloPoMo thing going, darn it. How about a self-centered post?

I have a lot of profiles online. There is quite a bit of crossover, but if you want to know how/why to follow me on the biggies, here you go.

Facebook

Here is my Facebook profile. Feel free to add me; just put some really short thing in the invite like "blog friend" or "Flickr contact." Otherwise, you'll get declined like the creepy guy I used to work with, or languish in the no-response lineup with obscure relatives I can't bring myself to accept or decline.

Use it if: You want to occasionally hear how my day went, and love to see videos about, read articles about, or hear my opinions on a variety of issues. The blog posts to here also, but I'm more likely to respond to blog comments on the blog.

Don't use if: You're only looking for regular photo sharing, or are offended by political opinions, evolution, immunizations, Harry Potter, and/or the occasional F word.

Google +

Here's my Google+ (or Google Plus, if you prefer) profile. Add away. I can add you back or not, but I probably will if you have a healthy profile as well.

Use it if: You want to follow my photos, especially some old favorites, which we're sharing through daily themes right now. I also occasionally share awesome photos from other G Plussers, usually spiders. Blog pimped here too. Only a tiny bit of opinion.

Don't use if: You don't like spiders. Seriously, I post a lot of spiders.

Flickr

If somehow you haven't had it foisted upon you before, here is my Flickr profile. I might have high and low periods on Flickr, but I'm way loyal to Flickr, mostly because it's where I started to get "into" photography, and where I got to know (or got to know better) several good friends.

Use it if: You like pictures, usually daily, but won't get all mad and stop following me if I flake for a week or two. It's where I post the daily shots for my Species a Day project. If it's photo related, I post it here, but there's not much of the other stuff. (Unfortunately, my life isn't daily photo strolls.)

Don't use if: You're not interested in photos, or if you're one of those photo snobs who scoffs at "shallow" comments. I love in-depth critique; really I do, but I'm totally OK with ten "Great shot!" comments in a row. Call me conceited. Also don't use it if you're a photo thief or are obsessed with bare feet. Weirdos.

Blog

My blog! You're already there. Hooray!

Use it if: You want to read regular posts on parenting, travel, nature, and/or photography. Sometimes, I'm funny too. Sometimes I try to be funny and it doesn't work out so well, but that's funny, at least, right? And comment away. Seriously. My ego is super happy every time I get a comment alert. Even when I reply to a comment, and then get a comment alert, and it's only me.

Don't use if: Who am I kidding? You can all use it. Did I mention the ego? But just so you know, spammers, I already have all the Ugg boots and Cialis I want, which is none.


E-mail

My e-mail is khosey1 at yahoo dot com. That's a "one" after my name.

Use it if: You want to have a conversation with me, but don't feel like having my friends and family weigh in on your personal life or political opinions. Also, use it if you're an editor. Yes, I probably do want to write for you.

Don't use if: You're sending any of these things. Or if you want me to write for free. Or if you're that creepy guy I used to work with.

There you go! I'm trying to be less of a failure at Twitter, where I also have a profile. Add me there if you'd like. The blog and photos get pimped there. I'll get better. Someday.

Smile!

Why doesn't he smile?

That's one of the most common questions I get about pictures of my son. (I'm not counting "Why do you endanger your child?" and "Can I use this picture for my creepy profile?") It'd be nice to see him smiling.

I always feel a little bad. Doesn't he? I wondered, looking back through some shots. No, he's usually straight-faced. I don't think it's so weird, though. My partner in crime is an awful lot like me in that way. If we find something interesting, we focus. Forget talking. Forget smiling. We're in the moment. Sometimes, smiling on purpose takes us out of it.

I never pose him. (OK. I do occasionally do the "Hey! Do that again, only over there in the sunlight and wait until I have my lens on!") I don't force him to smile. I rarely even ask him to smile. Besides the fact that he's the Absolute Worst Fake Smiler, and it looks like he's breaking his face, it just doesn't fit. He'll smile when he's ready.

The other reason we don't have as many smiling pictures, though -- I love it. And while I guess I can't fault you all for wanting more smiley shots ... why would I waste time getting the camera out when he's smiling?

Most of the time, he doesn't smile because he's happy. Sometimes, though, camera and spontaneous smiles coincide. So here you go. See? He smiles plenty.

Friday 5: Silhouettes

Silhouettes: 5 accidental gems

I always forget how much I love silhouettes. The simplicity. The contrast. The attention it draws to form. The graphic-poster feel. I'm usually not trying for them, at least initially. Here are five shots I really liked, and what I was really shooting for. (Hint: It was usually less exciting.)

Ant

What I was really after: Boring, poorly lit macros.

We found these awesome, huge ants in the desert. I tried a few different ways to get a good macro, but the light (not to mention the ants) refused to cooperate. A storm rolled in, and we walked around for a while, grabbing a few cloud and saguaro shots. Then, on our way back, the sky took on that cool post-storm lighting, and I picked up an ant on a stick, just for the heck of it.


Saguaros

What I was really after: Nothing.

This is a really old one. I wasn't even planning to use my camera. I was driving and saw the sunset right behind a stand of saguaro. My son said "Hey, why don't you take a picture?" I figured, hey, why don't I?


Fossil Springs tree

What I was really after: Darkening canyon walls.

We had spent the day hiking the Fossil Springs Wilderness, a gorgeous spring and riparian area in a canyon tucked away just south of the Mogollon Rim. Photo ops aplenty. The light had faded, I was putting my camera away for the day, and then this tree came into view.


Bubble heart

What I was really after: Normal bubble pictures.

Bubbles are best with the light shining on them to bring out the color, right? Well, not always. Luck + sunset lighting = awesome silhouette.


Kelp tank + son

What I was really after: Kelp tank + son. (!!)


OK, this one was intentional, at least, it was once I saw the amazing tank. I'd gone to the Birch Aquarium with thoughts of getting closeups of sea animals, and maybe some shots like this, showing off the wonder in David's face. Sometimes, a kid (even mine) isn't the focus of the story or photo. Sometimes, the wonder comes from being just a shape on the periphery, just a small outline, peering into a world that doesn't center on you at all. It's jarring, but in a beautiful way.

Or something like that. He stood there for half an hour, so there must have been something to it.

Silhouettes are quickly becoming my favorite shot, leading to images like this, this, and this; all of which I actually intended!

Mythbusting, arthropod style

I get questions in my inbox sometimes, being the "spider girl" and all. Besides "WHAT IS THIS?!" with an attached photo, urban legends are probably the most common. Other times, I get asked in person or it comes up in conversation. I'm like a magnet for ridiculous arthropod claims.

Maybe this will help. In no particular order, here are a few answers.
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The female black widow spider does not always eat her mate.

The praying mantis can, in fact, copulate without decapitating her mate. (However, she does seem to quite enjoy the practice. My husband is SO not allowed to balk at my mood-setting preferences anymore.)

No, that's not a spider bite. It looks like you scratched the top off a mosquito or ant bite, and it got scabby and infected. Quit doing that, and you'll be fine. Here, my son uses these Transformers Band-Aids when he has trouble remembering.

Falling asleep with candy in your mouth isn't too bright, but it certainly won't make ants burrow into your brain through your ears. You don't have to worry about earwigs either. I think you're thinking of Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan.

The daddy long-legs does not "have the most potent venom to humans, but its mouth is too small to bite humans." They're not venomous. Still, how would we test this, exactly? Extract the venom and kill a bunch of people on purpose?

Camel spiders (solpugids) are not two feet across. They do not "run screaming like a baby," nor do they eat camels from the inside out. They are not venomous. Also, I'm pretty sure they are the least of our soldiers' worries overseas.

No, that's not a spider bite. It looks like you pinched yourself in the car door.

No spider ever laid eggs in someone's skin, mouth, or beehive hairdo. Spiders are not waiting in airplane toilet seats to bite your butt.

Millipedes do not have a thousand legs. If it's roundish and has two pairs of legs per segment, it's a millipede.

For the love of god, it's venomous. Poisonous is when it's ingested or inhaled. Venom is injected into your bloodstream or deeper tissues. Most venom isn't even poisonous. And I am picturing you eating spiders when you say they're poisonous.

No, I don't think that's a spider bite either. Did you see what bit you? No? It probably wasn't a spider. And it definitely wasn't a black widow if it was daytime, you were in an open field, didn't reach beneath anything, and didn't see a web. And (for locals) it definitely definitely wasn't a brown recluse. We don't even have those here.

I don't know how many spiders the average person swallows in a year or a lifetime, and neither do you. That "statistic" was invented to see how far a bunch of gullible idiots would spread an idiotic claim with no evidence whatsoever.

Killing praying mantises isn't a crime, but you'd better not. I'll be sad and my son will lecture you forever if we ever catch you.

No, that's probably not a spider bite either.

Hitting: Always wrong

A downer post today. Head to yesterday’s post for pretty nature pictures. I’m doing a post every day this month, so I’ll probably be back to my regular nonsense and/or pretty pictures tomorrow.

I had a post half-written (OK, half written in my head, anyway), but this distracted me, and then made me watch in disgust, and then sickened and saddened me until there wasn’t room for anything else.

It’s a “father” -- a judge, no less -- hitting his 16-year-old repeatedly with a belt. Go watch it if you want to see it for yourself. I’m not posting the video here. The upshot: seven years ago, a child downloaded some stuff onto the family computer. Her father decided this was a good reason to beat the crap out of her, humiliate her, and demean her. Apparently, he’s continued the harassment, and/or she’s in the process of dealing or needed some leverage against him, so she just now shared it.

It’s sick. He’s sick.

And you know what? It’s sick when anyone hits a kid. For any reason.

At all.

I know this is over the top, even for people who endorse corporal punishment. I know some people have “planned spankings” and go to great pains to never do it out of anger. I know we’ve done it that way for ages. Heck, I was spanked for lying. I turned out OK. Most parents, spanking parents included, mean well.

To which I say, so the hell what? Matters of degrees don’t make “only a little assault” or “a small burglary” OK. We’ve been doing all kinds of things for ages that we eventually come to realize are bad, and we often muster up the integrity to stop doing those things. And as for the parents who mean well -- every medical study, every psychological study, every kind of study or observation done by anyone who’s not a psychopath; has concluded that spanking never solves the problem (even disobedience), and often makes things worse. And hitting to any large degree at all is abuse.

The judge wasn’t disciplining his daughter; he was beating up a kid. Congratulations, asshole.

Hitting other adults isn’t OK. Hitting children in schools isn’t OK. Children hitting other children isn’t OK. We need to stop hitting our own kids. It’s reprehensible. This guy is way more reprehensible, sure, but it’s sickening any time it happens.

Today, my son frustrated me. He refused to listen. When he did listen, he did the exact opposite of what I requested. He downloaded forbidden games onto my work computer, right after I stood in front of him and told him not to, for one. And the brattiness continued. Throughout the evening, he ignored me, moped when I tried to make him happy, and generally acted like a punk.

I wasn’t angry.

I was frustrated, sure. I probably didn’t handle it as well as I could have. And OK, maybe I was a little angry, if you want to call it that. But if anger is lashing out -- even wanting to lash out -- then no. If anger is using your displeasure to bludgeon the other person, literally or figuratively, then no. Never.

I want to make him obey sometimes, sure, but mostly I want to make him happy. I want to make him learn, and make him see things, and make him happy, and make him a responsible, compassionate, smart, ambitious man. (If you follow 99 percent of what I write about him, you'll see that this is usually the direction he chooses.) But you know what? I can’t make him any of these things. I can guide him. I can love him. I can’t force him. And I’ll never try.

If you ever feel anger toward a child -- real anger -- then, well, I would feel sorry for you, if I wasn’t busy feeling sad as hell for the kid. If you actually hit your child, my would-be sympathy goes out the window. Let’s all quit it. It’s wrong.

Travel Tuesday: Gilbert Riparian Preserve

So Mondays/Wednesdays are nature, and Fridays are roundups. How about a Travel Tuesday? I'll start with a recent published piece.

News flash, you guys! I like going to the Gilbert Riparian Preserve. I know, right? I really should have mentioned this in some other posts!

Still, I did an Official Piece on the Preserve in last month's Times Publications. Here it is, if you're interested. Seriously, get out there if you're in the Valley. It's fantastic outside right now.

Our family loves to take long sunset strolls. We also love wildlife watching, photography, birding, and astronomy. However these things take preparation, and there’s one other thing I love, as a parent: convenience. It’s lucky for all of us, then, that we found the Valley’s own oasis, Gilbert’s Riparian Preserve at Water Ranch.

One day while returning a book to the Southeast Regional Library, I decided to continue walking toward a modest lake behind the library. What I found was far beyond a small pond -- it was the entrance to the Riparian Institute in Gilbert, a 110-acre wildlife preserve containing several ponds and organized into different ecological zones that range from native Arizona riparian areas to swaths simulating marshlands.

I walked for miles that first day -- only stopping when I realized I had no water and hadn't prepared for an actual hike in this wonderland tucked unassumingly beside an urban library. The next day, I brought my son, David.

We arrived late in the afternoon, and stayed until dark. He was never bored. He walked for a couple miles straight -- and if you’re a parent, you can appreciate this next part -- and he didn’t whine once. He was too enthralled.

We saw white egrets and great blue herons stalking and soaring above me like modern-day pterodactyls. We watched black-necked stilts and American avocets, the small birds’ bills so thin and fragile that we wondered how they survived until we saw them spear and stir up small fish and tadpoles. Red-eared slider turtles sunned themselves on rocks and among reeds, disappearing beneath the water with a soft, wet plop if we got too close. Dragonflies in half a dozen vivid colors flitted around us: neon skimmers, blue darners, blue dashers, roseate skimmers, western pondhawks, and amberwings (and those are just the dragonflies I could readily identify).

We saw other people among the four and a half miles throughout the preserve: families fishing in the main urban pond, couples walking the back trails in search of a of a double-crested cormorant, a young mother pushing a stroller along one of the many easy trail sections. However, the place is designed so that people are never the main attraction, never distracting. I merely caught glimpses of others who were as engaged as I was in their own moments, stealing slices of time in nature before returning to the “real” world.

Actually, the Riparian Institute is very much connected to the real world. They create and preserve riparian areas that host almost 200 species of birds as well as numerous amphibians, reptiles, fish, insects, and mammals. They maintain seven water recharge basins for recycling waste water. Lastly, but perhaps most importantly, it’s a perfect place to bring your family if you want to learn about nature in a completely natural setting. Through nature festivals (check their website for upcoming events), guided tours such as bird and dragonfly walks, the preserve teaches appreciation for nature at every turn.

The next time we visited, David got even closer to the preserve’s residents. We crouched behind the reeds at a back pond for five minutes, surrounded by unseen (but startlingly loud) croaks. It tuned out to be a pair of herons barking to each other. Later, my son nestled in the grass on the bank and was promptly overrun by the preserve’s resident goose flock, which ate from his hands and generally caused a scene. (My son would like me to add that you’re supposed to feed them cracked corn or the mesquite seed pods they already gobble -- never bread.) That day, we stayed until dark, riding out a pink-and-peach sunset by the pond. It was amazing.

We’ve returned dozens of times since the first trip. The preserve is great to visit any time of year, but it’s especially nice now that temperatures are dropping down out of the “insanely hot” range. Try to hit it first thing in the morning, or late in the afternoon. These are the times the light is prettiest and the animals are most active. Find what you like to do there. And just stop. Let the place sink in. And watch.


For more on the Riparian Preserve at Water Ranch, check out http://riparianinstitute.org/

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P.S. I'm participating in this month's NaBloPoMo. A post each day!